Dear readers
I regret to inform all the avid readers who have been following Meaning Difficult to Forget that the series has been discontinued due to legitimate concerns regarding defamation. As such, all previous entries of this series will be deleted with immediate effect.
We apologize for any distress or inconvenience caused by this action.
Regards,
Infral Chronicles editorial team
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Dear Readers,
This is Kevin Lim here.
Due to the sudden disappearance of Ray Chang Yi Wei, we decided to end our story in a very abrupt manner through this way:
THE END!
Thank You.
As I have no more brain juice to be squeezed out, Edmund and I have pleaded with and finally got Yixuan and Michelle to be the co-writers for our brand new blockbuster story: Meaning Difficult to Forget. (Adapted From Yi Nan Wang)
Do support.
This is Kevin Lim here.
Due to the sudden disappearance of Ray Chang Yi Wei, we decided to end our story in a very abrupt manner through this way:
THE END!
Thank You.
As I have no more brain juice to be squeezed out, Edmund and I have pleaded with and finally got Yixuan and Michelle to be the co-writers for our brand new blockbuster story: Meaning Difficult to Forget. (Adapted From Yi Nan Wang)
Do support.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Chapter 3
The motley group of Tanya, Ida and Shane gathered around Ray. Hanwen had cast a spell to remove Edin's fist from the mass of Ray's hair, but it seemed that it had a slight side effect - Ray's hair caught fire.
The problem was soon solved though when Shane asked Ray to rock and roll (which Edin promptly corrected to stop, drop and roll).
"OK, so the reunion didn't really get to a good start. I apologise for that. I think my superhuman powers are influencing my hormones too much." Ray gushed.
Shane thought for a moment.
"Well, on the account of the 1 month free chococrunch we koped from your field, I forgive you."
And so they had a tight hug until Hanwen had fleeting thoughts of homosexuality, which grossed him out.
"Hey, cut that out. We have serious things to do now. Tanya, get the Un-united Nations to come and govern City-Which-Rocks in the interim. They'll most probably come in a zillion years' time, so you'll stay in City-Which-Rocks first. When you have handled stuff and found a rightful leader, catch up with me and Ray. We'll gather resources and set off first. There is no time to lose!" Hanwen ordered.
Tanya nodded, understanding the responsibilities that lie on her shoulders.
Ray nodded, dozing off and wandering to dreamland.
After receiving a teravolt shock from Hanwen's wand, Ray jolted from his hibernation state and a dream about being in a world where all men were hairy like him.
"Now, we need to find shelter."
The three heads turned to Ida, Shane and Edin. Then to their hut in the distance. Ray was trying the "doleful puppy eyes look" but after seeing the disgusted expressions around, decided to discontinue it.
Maybe society was not ready for his sexiness yet.
"Well, I can let you guys stay there if you give me something good..." Shane pondered aloud.
"I can forget the 5 million x-rated FHM (For Hairy Men) magazines you still owe me..." offered Ray tentatively.
"Deal!" Shane agreed decisively amid worried stares from Ida. Shane made a mental note to convince Ida later that he looked at the FHM magazine only for the hair loss control part. He was afraid his hair loss may lead to him looking less handsome, hurting his chances of winning Mr Bodybuilder.
And so the group left for the hut with the exception of Tanya who went over to the castle immediately. Things needed to be in control quickly.
Along the way Hanwen was in a buoyant mood. "Tomorrow we prepare for our journey. To infinity and beyond!" he proclaimed triumphantly.
Edin made a comment about not being able to go beyond infinity but it wasn't enough to dampen the mood of Hanwen.
"I mean, I have pokemon pearl to look forward too!" Hanwen thought, clutching the Nintendo DS that he took from the lord's armour.
The problem was soon solved though when Shane asked Ray to rock and roll (which Edin promptly corrected to stop, drop and roll).
"OK, so the reunion didn't really get to a good start. I apologise for that. I think my superhuman powers are influencing my hormones too much." Ray gushed.
Shane thought for a moment.
"Well, on the account of the 1 month free chococrunch we koped from your field, I forgive you."
And so they had a tight hug until Hanwen had fleeting thoughts of homosexuality, which grossed him out.
"Hey, cut that out. We have serious things to do now. Tanya, get the Un-united Nations to come and govern City-Which-Rocks in the interim. They'll most probably come in a zillion years' time, so you'll stay in City-Which-Rocks first. When you have handled stuff and found a rightful leader, catch up with me and Ray. We'll gather resources and set off first. There is no time to lose!" Hanwen ordered.
Tanya nodded, understanding the responsibilities that lie on her shoulders.
Ray nodded, dozing off and wandering to dreamland.
After receiving a teravolt shock from Hanwen's wand, Ray jolted from his hibernation state and a dream about being in a world where all men were hairy like him.
"Now, we need to find shelter."
The three heads turned to Ida, Shane and Edin. Then to their hut in the distance. Ray was trying the "doleful puppy eyes look" but after seeing the disgusted expressions around, decided to discontinue it.
Maybe society was not ready for his sexiness yet.
"Well, I can let you guys stay there if you give me something good..." Shane pondered aloud.
"I can forget the 5 million x-rated FHM (For Hairy Men) magazines you still owe me..." offered Ray tentatively.
"Deal!" Shane agreed decisively amid worried stares from Ida. Shane made a mental note to convince Ida later that he looked at the FHM magazine only for the hair loss control part. He was afraid his hair loss may lead to him looking less handsome, hurting his chances of winning Mr Bodybuilder.
And so the group left for the hut with the exception of Tanya who went over to the castle immediately. Things needed to be in control quickly.
Along the way Hanwen was in a buoyant mood. "Tomorrow we prepare for our journey. To infinity and beyond!" he proclaimed triumphantly.
Edin made a comment about not being able to go beyond infinity but it wasn't enough to dampen the mood of Hanwen.
"I mean, I have pokemon pearl to look forward too!" Hanwen thought, clutching the Nintendo DS that he took from the lord's armour.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Chapter 2
"Seems like he is dead." Ray said, poking the Lord-Who-Rocks' body with the Sword-That-Rocks.
"Seems like someone is approaching." Tanya commented, as she pointed to her left.
Everyone turned to where Tanya pointed, and true enough, someone was approaching, in fact, three people were approaching, two male, and one female.
Ray, upon noticing the female stranger, could not suppress his hormones any longer. "Hi babe!" Ray screamed across the field, waving his hands.
Ida hid behind Shane, who in turned yelled back at Ray, "@#!$ OFF! She is mine!" Shane stood in front of Ida and started flexing his muscles. "You want a fight?"
Ray was about to activate his red underwear's powers again, when Hanwen stopped him.
"He is just a mortal. There is no need for the powers of the legendary underwear." Hanwen said, trying his best to appear wise.
"Who cares man!" Edin screamed, as he rushed forward, clenching his fists, "Charge!!!"
After 10 minutes of running, Edin's fist finally connected with Ray, or at least, his hair.
"That itches." Ray commented, as he stared at Edin's fist, which was now entangled in his magnificent chest hair.
"Ah!!!" Edin attempted to punch Ray with his other fist, but it ended up getting entangled in his chest hair once again.
Tanya, Hanwen and Ray stared at Edin. "What are you doing?" They echoed.
"Impossible! There is no way I can't kill you with my fist!" Edin screamed, as he tried to pull his hands away from Ray.
"What do we do now?" Ida asked.
"Fear not. Sun Tze once said. Know the weakness of your enemies and victory is yours!" Shane declared loudly, as he crossed his arms and tried to look manly.
"Wow. I didn't know of such a thing! You are so knowledgeable!" Ida looked at Shane in admiration.
"Correction," Edin interrupted, with his hands still stuck in the black mass, "Firstly, I was the one who taught him that. Secondly, Sun Tze didn't say that. That was just the translated version of what he said."
"Can't you at least shut up for once?" Shane screamed, irritated by Edin's attempt to make Shane appear less manly.
"Yo look, maybe if you know how to apply that knowledge to the current situation, you might be able to extract your friend's hands. Yoyo." Hanwen rapped.
Shane taught about it for awhile.
"Correct. I remembered that my GP tutor taught me how to solve Application Questions. I am first supposed to analyse the question. So, what's the question?" Shane asked.
Hanwen sighed, took out his wand and conjured a pair of scissors, which he gave Shane. "Just hurry up and get your friend's hands away from that stuff. It's making me puke out the ChocoCrunch I had for breakfast."
"Seems like someone is approaching." Tanya commented, as she pointed to her left.
Everyone turned to where Tanya pointed, and true enough, someone was approaching, in fact, three people were approaching, two male, and one female.
Ray, upon noticing the female stranger, could not suppress his hormones any longer. "Hi babe!" Ray screamed across the field, waving his hands.
Ida hid behind Shane, who in turned yelled back at Ray, "@#!$ OFF! She is mine!" Shane stood in front of Ida and started flexing his muscles. "You want a fight?"
Ray was about to activate his red underwear's powers again, when Hanwen stopped him.
"He is just a mortal. There is no need for the powers of the legendary underwear." Hanwen said, trying his best to appear wise.
"Who cares man!" Edin screamed, as he rushed forward, clenching his fists, "Charge!!!"
After 10 minutes of running, Edin's fist finally connected with Ray, or at least, his hair.
"That itches." Ray commented, as he stared at Edin's fist, which was now entangled in his magnificent chest hair.
"Ah!!!" Edin attempted to punch Ray with his other fist, but it ended up getting entangled in his chest hair once again.
Tanya, Hanwen and Ray stared at Edin. "What are you doing?" They echoed.
"Impossible! There is no way I can't kill you with my fist!" Edin screamed, as he tried to pull his hands away from Ray.
"What do we do now?" Ida asked.
"Fear not. Sun Tze once said. Know the weakness of your enemies and victory is yours!" Shane declared loudly, as he crossed his arms and tried to look manly.
"Wow. I didn't know of such a thing! You are so knowledgeable!" Ida looked at Shane in admiration.
"Correction," Edin interrupted, with his hands still stuck in the black mass, "Firstly, I was the one who taught him that. Secondly, Sun Tze didn't say that. That was just the translated version of what he said."
"Can't you at least shut up for once?" Shane screamed, irritated by Edin's attempt to make Shane appear less manly.
"Yo look, maybe if you know how to apply that knowledge to the current situation, you might be able to extract your friend's hands. Yoyo." Hanwen rapped.
Shane taught about it for awhile.
"Correct. I remembered that my GP tutor taught me how to solve Application Questions. I am first supposed to analyse the question. So, what's the question?" Shane asked.
Hanwen sighed, took out his wand and conjured a pair of scissors, which he gave Shane. "Just hurry up and get your friend's hands away from that stuff. It's making me puke out the ChocoCrunch I had for breakfast."
Thursday, July 3, 2008
two - Chapter 1
It was all clear skies around this part of Infral. The City-Which-Rocks, governed by the autocratic rule of Lord Who Rock, has seen its fair share of quiet moments these years. Well, almost, except for the Lord Who Rocks' victory in Infral Idol and the chococrunch field incident a few months earlier.
Ray is still on the loose, and the lord has been getting more impatient with each day. His army of sorceresses had been searching everywhere.
The news of the chococrunch field that Ray had caused had by now, spread all over the city and perhaps, even to other parts of Infral. Ida Harfan and Shane Hui were among the first to know, for the couple lived just beside Ray's farm.
On that fateful day, Shane had been out in their sugarcane fields doing push-ups and crunches to maintain his large biceps and abs, while Ida was busy cooking breakfast in the little hut by their field.
Just as Shane was going back for more peanut oil for his bodybuilding session, he heard a rather loud sound of chocolate flooding Ray's wheat fields. The rest was history.
They had chococrunch for the whole month.
----------------------------------------
It had been many months since Ray had went off and they were missing him already. His friendliness and cheerfulness had been sort of taken for granted by them already, they realized.
It was a hot afternoon when the couple heard an explosion at the wheat field that used to be Ray's.
"Bloody !@#$%^! What happened?" Ida exclaimed.
Shane felt this was the time to take control of the situation and show his male dominance.
"Come my love, we shall see what is the commotion about. With me around, you shall have no fear." he announced confidently.
A voice resonated in the room. "Hey, I'm coming along too!"
That came from Edin, brother of Shane. Being more handsome, smarter, stronger and generally more likable than Shane, he was rather popular when he entered Infral Idol recently. He lost out to Lord Who Rocks in the final, who won with a whopping 99% majority.
He had even beaten Ray in the Semi Finals. Which was a great feat considering Ray's appeal among the aunties.
Edin emerged from his room. He had been writing a new strategy book for Pokemon Pearl recently. He's thinking of adopting Sun Tzu's strategies inside this new book.
Shane agreed to let Edin come along reluctantly, ruing his lost chance to appear manly in front of Ida.
Little did they know that the trip to the now chococrunch-field was about to turn into a journey of a lifetime.
Ray is still on the loose, and the lord has been getting more impatient with each day. His army of sorceresses had been searching everywhere.
The news of the chococrunch field that Ray had caused had by now, spread all over the city and perhaps, even to other parts of Infral. Ida Harfan and Shane Hui were among the first to know, for the couple lived just beside Ray's farm.
On that fateful day, Shane had been out in their sugarcane fields doing push-ups and crunches to maintain his large biceps and abs, while Ida was busy cooking breakfast in the little hut by their field.
Just as Shane was going back for more peanut oil for his bodybuilding session, he heard a rather loud sound of chocolate flooding Ray's wheat fields. The rest was history.
They had chococrunch for the whole month.
----------------------------------------
It had been many months since Ray had went off and they were missing him already. His friendliness and cheerfulness had been sort of taken for granted by them already, they realized.
It was a hot afternoon when the couple heard an explosion at the wheat field that used to be Ray's.
"Bloody !@#$%^! What happened?" Ida exclaimed.
Shane felt this was the time to take control of the situation and show his male dominance.
"Come my love, we shall see what is the commotion about. With me around, you shall have no fear." he announced confidently.
A voice resonated in the room. "Hey, I'm coming along too!"
That came from Edin, brother of Shane. Being more handsome, smarter, stronger and generally more likable than Shane, he was rather popular when he entered Infral Idol recently. He lost out to Lord Who Rocks in the final, who won with a whopping 99% majority.
He had even beaten Ray in the Semi Finals. Which was a great feat considering Ray's appeal among the aunties.
Edin emerged from his room. He had been writing a new strategy book for Pokemon Pearl recently. He's thinking of adopting Sun Tzu's strategies inside this new book.
Shane agreed to let Edin come along reluctantly, ruing his lost chance to appear manly in front of Ida.
Little did they know that the trip to the now chococrunch-field was about to turn into a journey of a lifetime.
Chapter 18
The lord came closer to Ray and his gang.
"I should have expected," The lord took out a large, red loudspeaker from nowhere and shouted into it, "It just has to be you, Hanwen."
"Yo manz look, I'm not here to fight you," Hanwen replied, as he placed his wand back into his pocket, "The one to beat is this hairy man over here, Shining Ray O'Flight!" he continued, as he pointed to Ray, who was still gripping tightly to his red underwear.
"Lulz? You are sending that gay to fight me?" The lord laughed loudly. "You must be joking."
"Seriously, you don't have to use that loudspeaker, you know?" Tanya pointed out, "We are not exactly very far away right now, seeing that you are just about 10 metres away from us."
"Look before you speak, loser." Hanwen added, pointing at Ray, "This guy over here is one of the Five Chosen Ones. He will beat you in a flash."
Hanwen whispered into Ray's ears, "Just put on your underwear. Remember to ask him for my DS before you kill him." Ray nodded his head.
"Oh yeah?" The lord unsheathed his legendary blade, the Sword-That-Rocks, "Let the battle begin!"
"Shaolin Showdown!" Ray shouted, as he put on his underwear.
"OMG I'm HOT!" Ray began to burn like he did previously.
"To hell with you!" The lord raised his sword up into the air and brought it down on Ray. "Die to my Sword-That-Rocks!"
Just before the legendary sword struck Ray, large, purple vines sprouted from the ground and held the Lord-Who-Rocks firmly to the ground.
"What the, who's gay vines are those?" The lord shouted, as he tried to break free of the vines' grip.
"Eh, I'm not that hot now." Ray said.
Hanwen patted him on his shoulder. "Congratulations brother, you have mastered the powers of your red undies. From now onwards, you will be able to use your powers without overheating."
Ray looked at his underwear in amazement.
After a few minutes of staring at his red underwear, he finally realised that the Lord-Who-Rocks is still not defeated.
"Let me go you @#$%!" the lord screamed loudly, as he continued trying to get out of the vines.
"Lend me that for a moment," Ray asked politely as he reached for the Lord-Who-Rocks' Sword-That-Rocks.
"Byebye, evil lord." Ray aimed for the lord's head and slashed through it with the blade.
"Oops, I missed." Ray said as he realised that all he has managed to slash is some strands of hair.
After several tries to end the lord's life, Ray finally succeeded.
"Hurray! We are the champions!"
---End of Season One - Legend of Ray O'Flight
"I should have expected," The lord took out a large, red loudspeaker from nowhere and shouted into it, "It just has to be you, Hanwen."
"Yo manz look, I'm not here to fight you," Hanwen replied, as he placed his wand back into his pocket, "The one to beat is this hairy man over here, Shining Ray O'Flight!" he continued, as he pointed to Ray, who was still gripping tightly to his red underwear.
"Lulz? You are sending that gay to fight me?" The lord laughed loudly. "You must be joking."
"Seriously, you don't have to use that loudspeaker, you know?" Tanya pointed out, "We are not exactly very far away right now, seeing that you are just about 10 metres away from us."
"Look before you speak, loser." Hanwen added, pointing at Ray, "This guy over here is one of the Five Chosen Ones. He will beat you in a flash."
Hanwen whispered into Ray's ears, "Just put on your underwear. Remember to ask him for my DS before you kill him." Ray nodded his head.
"Oh yeah?" The lord unsheathed his legendary blade, the Sword-That-Rocks, "Let the battle begin!"
"Shaolin Showdown!" Ray shouted, as he put on his underwear.
"OMG I'm HOT!" Ray began to burn like he did previously.
"To hell with you!" The lord raised his sword up into the air and brought it down on Ray. "Die to my Sword-That-Rocks!"
Just before the legendary sword struck Ray, large, purple vines sprouted from the ground and held the Lord-Who-Rocks firmly to the ground.
"What the, who's gay vines are those?" The lord shouted, as he tried to break free of the vines' grip.
"Eh, I'm not that hot now." Ray said.
Hanwen patted him on his shoulder. "Congratulations brother, you have mastered the powers of your red undies. From now onwards, you will be able to use your powers without overheating."
Ray looked at his underwear in amazement.
After a few minutes of staring at his red underwear, he finally realised that the Lord-Who-Rocks is still not defeated.
"Let me go you @#$%!" the lord screamed loudly, as he continued trying to get out of the vines.
"Lend me that for a moment," Ray asked politely as he reached for the Lord-Who-Rocks' Sword-That-Rocks.
"Byebye, evil lord." Ray aimed for the lord's head and slashed through it with the blade.
"Oops, I missed." Ray said as he realised that all he has managed to slash is some strands of hair.
After several tries to end the lord's life, Ray finally succeeded.
"Hurray! We are the champions!"
---End of Season One - Legend of Ray O'Flight
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Chapter 17
A deathly silence consumed the entire field. The powerful explosion had killed the sorcerers. Hanwen has done it again with a single spell.
Ray was visibly affected by the loss of his chococrunch field. So much that he did not realise that his clothes were burnt off in the great spell hanwen had cast. All his hard work was, quite literally, gone in a flash.
This disturbed him so much that he went off to have a little cry while hanwen tried to remember how to conjure a set of clothing for Ray to avoid getting nightmares the following week.
"OK, stop crying. We have a mission to get on with. And please wear the Pokemon clothes I conjured quickly please. Its revolting." Hanwen rattled.
Tanya offered Ray a box of chococrunch to lessen his suffering. Ray seemed ever so slightly cheered by the gesture.
Just then, a distant horn sounded. Ray recognized it instantly. For it was the same battle horn that sounded every time Lord Who Rocks went out to battle.
The lord came into sight, riding on a white horse with shining amour.
Tanya stood up, clutching the wand in her hand.
Ray followed, gripping the red underwear tightly in his fist.
Hanwen got up of his seat and stood with an imposing pose, screaming some battle cry.
"Its time to settle this score with him. And get that Nintendo DS!"
The battle has begun.
Ray was visibly affected by the loss of his chococrunch field. So much that he did not realise that his clothes were burnt off in the great spell hanwen had cast. All his hard work was, quite literally, gone in a flash.
This disturbed him so much that he went off to have a little cry while hanwen tried to remember how to conjure a set of clothing for Ray to avoid getting nightmares the following week.
"OK, stop crying. We have a mission to get on with. And please wear the Pokemon clothes I conjured quickly please. Its revolting." Hanwen rattled.
Tanya offered Ray a box of chococrunch to lessen his suffering. Ray seemed ever so slightly cheered by the gesture.
Just then, a distant horn sounded. Ray recognized it instantly. For it was the same battle horn that sounded every time Lord Who Rocks went out to battle.
The lord came into sight, riding on a white horse with shining amour.
Tanya stood up, clutching the wand in her hand.
Ray followed, gripping the red underwear tightly in his fist.
Hanwen got up of his seat and stood with an imposing pose, screaming some battle cry.
"Its time to settle this score with him. And get that Nintendo DS!"
The battle has begun.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Chapter 16
After walking for about 123456789 seconds on the road, they saw a group of men cloaked in black walking towards them.
"OMG here they come!" Ray screamed, as he ran to hide behind Hanwen.
"Yo brother relax. We are not at Infral yet. Those are just simulations of the evil sorcerers. It's the Psychological Defense part of Total Defense, ya know? The more you see them, the less you are scared of them," Hanwen said, as he checked Google Maps once again, "Anyway, we should be reaching City-Which-Rocks in about 3 seconds."
"3, 2, 1." Ray counted aloud. "Why are we still here?" he asked.
"I think it may be due to the fact that we didn't walk at all for the past 3 seconds." Tanya pointed out.
Hanwen slapped Tanya, "How dare you steal my chance of showing off my ultimate wisdom."
"Sorry boss." Tanya apologised.
"Let's go." Hanwen announced, as he led Ray and Tanya down the road.
"3, 2, 1."
All the trees that had once surrounded them disappeared, and in its place, a large, brown field appeared.
"OMG that's my chocolate wheat field!" Ray screamed as he rushed towards his beloved wheat field.
"You have finally returned." A group of men cloaked in black appeared.
"Simulations?" Ray asked, as he looked at Hanwen, waiting for his answer.
"Abra Kadabra!" A green flash of light flew out from the tip of one of the sorcerer's wand.
"Ah!!!" Ray screamed as he took out the red underwear he had found previously and began putting it on.
"Yo brother. Relax man. I will handle this." Hanwen stopped Ray from putting on his red underwear, as he withdrew his wand.
"Abra Kadabra Alakazam!" Hanwen cried, as a flash of rainbow-coloured light flew out of his wand and collided with the green light, causing a loud explosion and blowing up the chocolate wheatfield.
"No!!!" Ray screamed. "My ChocoCrunch!!!
Glossary:
Abra Kadabra: Spell casted by Lord Who Rock's sorcerers, supposedly having the power to kill one upon contact.
Abra Kadabra Alakazam: Improved form of Abra Kadabra, casted by Hanwen
City-Which-Rocks: The city ruled by Lord-Who-Rocks
"OMG here they come!" Ray screamed, as he ran to hide behind Hanwen.
"Yo brother relax. We are not at Infral yet. Those are just simulations of the evil sorcerers. It's the Psychological Defense part of Total Defense, ya know? The more you see them, the less you are scared of them," Hanwen said, as he checked Google Maps once again, "Anyway, we should be reaching City-Which-Rocks in about 3 seconds."
"3, 2, 1." Ray counted aloud. "Why are we still here?" he asked.
"I think it may be due to the fact that we didn't walk at all for the past 3 seconds." Tanya pointed out.
Hanwen slapped Tanya, "How dare you steal my chance of showing off my ultimate wisdom."
"Sorry boss." Tanya apologised.
"Let's go." Hanwen announced, as he led Ray and Tanya down the road.
"3, 2, 1."
All the trees that had once surrounded them disappeared, and in its place, a large, brown field appeared.
"OMG that's my chocolate wheat field!" Ray screamed as he rushed towards his beloved wheat field.
"You have finally returned." A group of men cloaked in black appeared.
"Simulations?" Ray asked, as he looked at Hanwen, waiting for his answer.
"Abra Kadabra!" A green flash of light flew out from the tip of one of the sorcerer's wand.
"Ah!!!" Ray screamed as he took out the red underwear he had found previously and began putting it on.
"Yo brother. Relax man. I will handle this." Hanwen stopped Ray from putting on his red underwear, as he withdrew his wand.
"Abra Kadabra Alakazam!" Hanwen cried, as a flash of rainbow-coloured light flew out of his wand and collided with the green light, causing a loud explosion and blowing up the chocolate wheatfield.
"No!!!" Ray screamed. "My ChocoCrunch!!!
Glossary:
Abra Kadabra: Spell casted by Lord Who Rock's sorcerers, supposedly having the power to kill one upon contact.
Abra Kadabra Alakazam: Improved form of Abra Kadabra, casted by Hanwen
City-Which-Rocks: The city ruled by Lord-Who-Rocks
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Glossary
Due to comments that readers were confused, we will be clarifying background of the story, as well as some terms used.
Background
Infral is a world that exists in the same universe as the one we live in. Trade relations between Earth and Infral have been around since the Shenzhou XXI found it on a inter-galaxy exploratory trip.
Infral is populated with about 55 billion inhabitants. These people are spread across 3 continents, each conveniently ruled by a fuedal lord. The social structure of the 3 societies is simple: one lord, some servants, many slaves.
Among the lords, The Dark Lord is probably the most feared. Actually, little has been seen of him. The other lords are Lord Who Rocks and Lord Farquhar.
This story narrates primarily the journey of Ray and his compatriots to free Infral from the rule of these lords.
Terms
dimension: a universe within the multiverse
multiverse: hypothetical set of multiple possible universes in reality
dimensionless dimension: the dimension hanwen resides in
ray: a main character who used to be a farmer in Lord Who Rocks' city. Also known as Shining Ray O' Flight
Infral: the planet in a system near the solar system where 3 lords rule the rest
Oz: a city near the one ruled by Lord Who Rocks.
tanya: a sorcerer who helps ray in his journey
hanwen: the wise being helping ray along his journey
wireless@infral: the wireless network in Infral
Background
Infral is a world that exists in the same universe as the one we live in. Trade relations between Earth and Infral have been around since the Shenzhou XXI found it on a inter-galaxy exploratory trip.
Infral is populated with about 55 billion inhabitants. These people are spread across 3 continents, each conveniently ruled by a fuedal lord. The social structure of the 3 societies is simple: one lord, some servants, many slaves.
Among the lords, The Dark Lord is probably the most feared. Actually, little has been seen of him. The other lords are Lord Who Rocks and Lord Farquhar.
This story narrates primarily the journey of Ray and his compatriots to free Infral from the rule of these lords.
Terms
dimension: a universe within the multiverse
multiverse: hypothetical set of multiple possible universes in reality
dimensionless dimension: the dimension hanwen resides in
ray: a main character who used to be a farmer in Lord Who Rocks' city. Also known as Shining Ray O' Flight
Infral: the planet in a system near the solar system where 3 lords rule the rest
Oz: a city near the one ruled by Lord Who Rocks.
tanya: a sorcerer who helps ray in his journey
hanwen: the wise being helping ray along his journey
wireless@infral: the wireless network in Infral
Chapter 15
The laundry shop turned out to be rather far. After checking on Google Maps on Tanya's PDA, they realised that the nearest one was about 500 kilometres away.
But the lucky thing was that they noticed that the McDonny's Laundry Shop, the nearest around, had their very own McDelivery service. Which promised to serve "everybody everywhere".
"I guess that includes our dimensionless dimension then." Ray croaked. His voice really did sound like a croak, mainly because he was silently afraid that they'll be stuck here forever or be forced to trudge through the 500 kilometres. Which was quite a lot, covering more metres than bytes in his brain storage.
"OK, I'll call them now. Where's my banana phone?"
----------------------------------
After a day, a man with parcel appeared at one of the doors along the long corridor. He appeared in a weird looking uniform that read "FedUPS".
Apparently, the McDonny call operator baulked at the thought of traveling so far. She suggested a much more convenient way (at least for her) to ensure the delivery of the laundry and the items found inside. Which was to use the delivery services of FedUPS, the new company formed from a horizontal-merger of FedEX and UPS. Hanwen will then pay when he received them.
"Thanks for using FedUPS! We hope you will not be fed up with our service. That'll be 400 million mesos." The deliveryman told them politely.
"That costs da bomb, y'know?" Hanwen grumbled.
After a fierce haggle over the price and reducing it to 399 million mesos, Hanwen took his wand from the parcel and conjured out 399 million mesos to pay the man.
"Now we're ready to go! We're gonna rock da place manz!" Hanwen said excitedly.
He cast the spell, screaming "Teleportaros Infral!" in a high pitched voice.
----------------------------------
Ray looked around and realised he was in a rainforest. With a yellow brick road winding through it.
"I recognise this road! It leads from Oz to my city!" Ray exclaimed. He had traveled to Oz previously to sell his wheat to the pie makers there. The inflation rate in his city was rather low unfortunately for him. Coupled with the stupid price ceilings the lord placed, the prices of wheat were very much lower than in Oz. Wheat was like oil in Oz, fetching 14 thousand mesos a kilogram.
After checking with the PDA on which direction to head, the party consisting of hanwen, ray and tanya proceeded to the his old home, land of the first lord. Filled with a strong sense of purpose and determined to free the people subjected under him. That was their primary wish.
Of course, there were secondary wishes like getting the ChocoCrunch Ray left behind. And also the lord's prized pokemon figurines' collection.
Glossary
inflation rise in general level of prices of goods and services over time
price ceiling government-imposed limit on how high a price can be charged on a product
But the lucky thing was that they noticed that the McDonny's Laundry Shop, the nearest around, had their very own McDelivery service. Which promised to serve "everybody everywhere".
"I guess that includes our dimensionless dimension then." Ray croaked. His voice really did sound like a croak, mainly because he was silently afraid that they'll be stuck here forever or be forced to trudge through the 500 kilometres. Which was quite a lot, covering more metres than bytes in his brain storage.
"OK, I'll call them now. Where's my banana phone?"
----------------------------------
After a day, a man with parcel appeared at one of the doors along the long corridor. He appeared in a weird looking uniform that read "FedUPS".
Apparently, the McDonny call operator baulked at the thought of traveling so far. She suggested a much more convenient way (at least for her) to ensure the delivery of the laundry and the items found inside. Which was to use the delivery services of FedUPS, the new company formed from a horizontal-merger of FedEX and UPS. Hanwen will then pay when he received them.
"Thanks for using FedUPS! We hope you will not be fed up with our service. That'll be 400 million mesos." The deliveryman told them politely.
"That costs da bomb, y'know?" Hanwen grumbled.
After a fierce haggle over the price and reducing it to 399 million mesos, Hanwen took his wand from the parcel and conjured out 399 million mesos to pay the man.
"Now we're ready to go! We're gonna rock da place manz!" Hanwen said excitedly.
He cast the spell, screaming "Teleportaros Infral!" in a high pitched voice.
----------------------------------
Ray looked around and realised he was in a rainforest. With a yellow brick road winding through it.
"I recognise this road! It leads from Oz to my city!" Ray exclaimed. He had traveled to Oz previously to sell his wheat to the pie makers there. The inflation rate in his city was rather low unfortunately for him. Coupled with the stupid price ceilings the lord placed, the prices of wheat were very much lower than in Oz. Wheat was like oil in Oz, fetching 14 thousand mesos a kilogram.
After checking with the PDA on which direction to head, the party consisting of hanwen, ray and tanya proceeded to the his old home, land of the first lord. Filled with a strong sense of purpose and determined to free the people subjected under him. That was their primary wish.
Of course, there were secondary wishes like getting the ChocoCrunch Ray left behind. And also the lord's prized pokemon figurines' collection.
Glossary
inflation rise in general level of prices of goods and services over time
price ceiling government-imposed limit on how high a price can be charged on a product
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Chapter 14
"But how do we go there?" Ray asked, looking as puzzled as ever.
"Lulz what a trick question," Hanwen laughed, "I've taught Tanya the Dimension Travel Spell. Just use it."
"Erm," Tanya hesitated for a moment, "I've lost my wand."
"What? The wand? The wand that I personally made for you using some random wood which I found on the floor and magically imbued with Ray's hair?" Hanwen shouted at Tanya.
"Excuse me," Ray interrupted, "When did you get my hair?"
"Yo brother I have no time to explain to you right now. We have much more important things to do right now. Such as getting another random piece of wood for me to create another wand." Hanwen said, as he looked around the place in search of a piece of wood.
After spending 3 hours searching along the corridor and all its doors, they finally concluded that they will never find a piece of wood in this Dimensionless Dimension.
"What now?" Ray asked, tears welling up in his eyes again.
"Yo don't cry brother," Hanwen placed an arm over Ray's shoulder, trying to comfort him, "I have another plan."
Tanya and Ray looked at Hanwen, "Which is?"
"To use my own wand to teleport you people out." Hanwen replied, as he reached into his pocket.
"You should have said that earlier and save us the 3 hours we spent!" Tanya shouted.
Hanwen glared at her, "How dare you shout at me."
"Sorry boss." Tanya apologised.
"Has anyone seen my wand?" Hanwen asked, "I remember putting it into my Billabong wallet which I placed into my pocket when I came here."
"Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you weren't wearing this army uniform when you arrived." Ray said.
"Oh man you are so smart, brother," Hanwen patted Ray on the shoulder, who smiled back in response.
"Now, we are ready to save the world. Except for one thing." Hanwen announced.
Tanya looked inquisitively at Hanwen, "Which is?"
"I've sent my baggy hip-hop pants to the laundry via FedEx." Hanwen said.
"Oh man. Looks like we have to wait till your pants gets sent back." Tanya said as she sat on the floor, looking irritated.
"I thought so too," Hanwen added, "Till I realised that I didn't pay them mesos for them to deliver it back to me. Which means we have to collect it ourself."
"And where did you send it to?" Tanya asked, getting more irritated by the second.
"The nearest laundry shop." Hanwen replied.
"Which is?"
"How do I know?" Hanwen answered, "I just told them to send it to the nearest laundry shop. The second nearest one will cost 10 mesos more you know."
"Lulz what a trick question," Hanwen laughed, "I've taught Tanya the Dimension Travel Spell. Just use it."
"Erm," Tanya hesitated for a moment, "I've lost my wand."
"What? The wand? The wand that I personally made for you using some random wood which I found on the floor and magically imbued with Ray's hair?" Hanwen shouted at Tanya.
"Excuse me," Ray interrupted, "When did you get my hair?"
"Yo brother I have no time to explain to you right now. We have much more important things to do right now. Such as getting another random piece of wood for me to create another wand." Hanwen said, as he looked around the place in search of a piece of wood.
After spending 3 hours searching along the corridor and all its doors, they finally concluded that they will never find a piece of wood in this Dimensionless Dimension.
"What now?" Ray asked, tears welling up in his eyes again.
"Yo don't cry brother," Hanwen placed an arm over Ray's shoulder, trying to comfort him, "I have another plan."
Tanya and Ray looked at Hanwen, "Which is?"
"To use my own wand to teleport you people out." Hanwen replied, as he reached into his pocket.
"You should have said that earlier and save us the 3 hours we spent!" Tanya shouted.
Hanwen glared at her, "How dare you shout at me."
"Sorry boss." Tanya apologised.
"Has anyone seen my wand?" Hanwen asked, "I remember putting it into my Billabong wallet which I placed into my pocket when I came here."
"Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you weren't wearing this army uniform when you arrived." Ray said.
"Oh man you are so smart, brother," Hanwen patted Ray on the shoulder, who smiled back in response.
"Now, we are ready to save the world. Except for one thing." Hanwen announced.
Tanya looked inquisitively at Hanwen, "Which is?"
"I've sent my baggy hip-hop pants to the laundry via FedEx." Hanwen said.
"Oh man. Looks like we have to wait till your pants gets sent back." Tanya said as she sat on the floor, looking irritated.
"I thought so too," Hanwen added, "Till I realised that I didn't pay them mesos for them to deliver it back to me. Which means we have to collect it ourself."
"And where did you send it to?" Tanya asked, getting more irritated by the second.
"The nearest laundry shop." Hanwen replied.
"Which is?"
"How do I know?" Hanwen answered, "I just told them to send it to the nearest laundry shop. The second nearest one will cost 10 mesos more you know."
Friday, June 20, 2008
Chapter 13
The brief dispute about the missing Nintendo DS has dampened Hanwen's spirits a little, but the sight of The Hairy One seemed to have softened the impact on him.
"Yo brother! How is it going man? I see your hair's still as gloriously long as ever!" He rambled in a half-rap manner.
"Well, the Infral 101 treatment has been working well i guess."
Tanya interrupted them. "OK, I hate to spoil this happy reunion thing, but maybe we can focus on the task instead? We have a world to save you know."
"Chill out man! One thing at a time okay, too much bling bling at a time blinds people. Let's just focus on da man, the hairy one ya? I mean I don't know the chosen ones even though I chose them!"
And so they chatted and played Pokemon Coliseum on his GameCube. In between glorious battles between his Rayquaza and their Charmanders, he filled them in on the background.
"Ok, so da main thing is that I'm here to help you guys defeat the evil feudal lords. There are 3 lords in Infral now, among them the greatest and most dangerous being Hello Kitty the Dark Lord. I tell you, she's a real pain. My feud with her goes a long way back into history, maybe I'll tell you guys some time. But we had more than a few catfights, I must admit."
Ray felt shivers down his spine. Hello Kitty sure sounds scary to him.
"Of course, we'll have to defeat the lower lords first. So first on our hitlist is The Lord Who Rocks. That !@#$%^ still owes me some pokemon energy cards."
That night, Ray couldn't sleep. The thoughts of Hello Kitty and her evil deeds made him worry that even here, he may not be safe. Hanwen sure hasn't seemed as wise as he had imagined.
---------------------------------------
The next morning however, he was awakened to the screams and shouts of a crazy military commander. Rubbing his eyes, the brief shape materialized into Hanwen in a military uniform.
"Private Ray, wake up and do your 45 rounds down the corridor now! I want no doors left unopened!"
His nightmare had just begun. His doubts about Hanwen vanished soon that day.
---------------------------------------
It has been a week of intensive military-style training and Ray had never felt fitter. The lessons on controlling his superpowers have of course improved too with the meditation sessions.
Tanya, who had been going through the same military training, felt exhausted on the other hand. She had already tried to conjure a drinks machine, a robot that looks like her, everything. But Hanwen's eyes were no match for her small tricks.
"I miss townsville already. At least we got nice waffles there! And nice bubble baths!"
Tanya suddenly received a message on her PDA.
"Oh Great One, I have received bad news from my spies in Infral. The lord is going on a Brides for Export economic development programme! He wants to export innocent and helpless females to other worlds to fund his new IR (Individual Resort)!"
"That doesn't really concern me you know." Hanwen said matter-of-factly.
"But earth will most probably place a trade sanction, and you won't get you Pokemon merchendise! Not to mention your Nintendo DS."
"OK, that's the last straw. We are going to Infral to set things right once and for all!"
---------------------------------------
"Yo brother! How is it going man? I see your hair's still as gloriously long as ever!" He rambled in a half-rap manner.
"Well, the Infral 101 treatment has been working well i guess."
Tanya interrupted them. "OK, I hate to spoil this happy reunion thing, but maybe we can focus on the task instead? We have a world to save you know."
"Chill out man! One thing at a time okay, too much bling bling at a time blinds people. Let's just focus on da man, the hairy one ya? I mean I don't know the chosen ones even though I chose them!"
And so they chatted and played Pokemon Coliseum on his GameCube. In between glorious battles between his Rayquaza and their Charmanders, he filled them in on the background.
"Ok, so da main thing is that I'm here to help you guys defeat the evil feudal lords. There are 3 lords in Infral now, among them the greatest and most dangerous being Hello Kitty the Dark Lord. I tell you, she's a real pain. My feud with her goes a long way back into history, maybe I'll tell you guys some time. But we had more than a few catfights, I must admit."
Ray felt shivers down his spine. Hello Kitty sure sounds scary to him.
"Of course, we'll have to defeat the lower lords first. So first on our hitlist is The Lord Who Rocks. That !@#$%^ still owes me some pokemon energy cards."
That night, Ray couldn't sleep. The thoughts of Hello Kitty and her evil deeds made him worry that even here, he may not be safe. Hanwen sure hasn't seemed as wise as he had imagined.
---------------------------------------
The next morning however, he was awakened to the screams and shouts of a crazy military commander. Rubbing his eyes, the brief shape materialized into Hanwen in a military uniform.
"Private Ray, wake up and do your 45 rounds down the corridor now! I want no doors left unopened!"
His nightmare had just begun. His doubts about Hanwen vanished soon that day.
---------------------------------------
It has been a week of intensive military-style training and Ray had never felt fitter. The lessons on controlling his superpowers have of course improved too with the meditation sessions.
Tanya, who had been going through the same military training, felt exhausted on the other hand. She had already tried to conjure a drinks machine, a robot that looks like her, everything. But Hanwen's eyes were no match for her small tricks.
"I miss townsville already. At least we got nice waffles there! And nice bubble baths!"
Tanya suddenly received a message on her PDA.
"Oh Great One, I have received bad news from my spies in Infral. The lord is going on a Brides for Export economic development programme! He wants to export innocent and helpless females to other worlds to fund his new IR (Individual Resort)!"
"That doesn't really concern me you know." Hanwen said matter-of-factly.
"But earth will most probably place a trade sanction, and you won't get you Pokemon merchendise! Not to mention your Nintendo DS."
"OK, that's the last straw. We are going to Infral to set things right once and for all!"
---------------------------------------
Chapter 12
"Let's begin work!" Tanya screamed excitedly. "I want my mesos!"
"Alright..." Ray wiped off the tears in his eyes and dragged his feet to the door nearest to him. He opened it and all he saw was pitch-black darkness.
"I have a plan!" Tanya said, grinning happily, "Let's ask whether Hanwen is there by shouting instead of going into every door! I can't believe how smart I am."
"Wow. I've never thought of that!" Ray praised Tanya, thinking that they would be able to find Hanwen soon. "ANYBODY THERE?" Ray shouted into the door.
"No..."
"Alright. Sorry for the interruption." Ray apologised, as he closed the door gently.
"I have a smarter plan!" Ray exclaimed, as he thought of an ingenious idea. "I will open the doors on my left, and you will open those on my right. That will speed things up!"
"Wow. You are smart!"
"Let's carry on then," Ray instructed, as they carried on opening the doors.
"ANYBODY THERE?" "ANYBODY THERE?" "No..." "No..."
After what seemed like hours, both of them were tired. "Man when is this going to end." Ray said, as he lay on the floor.
"Can't you two walk straight? I'm sick of waiting."
A handsome, young man came within sight. He was wearing a big, shiny gold necklace, baggy pants and a T-shirt that wrote: YoYoYo. "I was just 100m away from you. Who ever told you I was behind the doors?" He said, apparently irritated after waiting for so long.
"Impossible. Are you the legendary..." Tanya screamed, shocked by what she saw.
"Yoz! Sup man! Where is my Pokemon Pearl?" the man held out his hand in front of Tanya.
"There, holy one." Tanya waved her wand around. "Qwerty!" A pinkish cartridge with the words "Pokemon Pearl" appeared in the young man's hand.
"Where is my Nintendo DS?" the man asked once again.
"What is that?" Tanya asked, with a blank look on her face.
"You mean you didn't know that Pokemon Pearl can only be played on Nintendo DS? I only have Gameboy you @#$%!" he screamed.
"Erm. What are you two talking about?" Ray raised up his hand and asked politely.
"Yoyo! You must be one of the Chosen Five, the Hairy One. Nice to meet you."
"Alright..." Ray wiped off the tears in his eyes and dragged his feet to the door nearest to him. He opened it and all he saw was pitch-black darkness.
"I have a plan!" Tanya said, grinning happily, "Let's ask whether Hanwen is there by shouting instead of going into every door! I can't believe how smart I am."
"Wow. I've never thought of that!" Ray praised Tanya, thinking that they would be able to find Hanwen soon. "ANYBODY THERE?" Ray shouted into the door.
"No..."
"Alright. Sorry for the interruption." Ray apologised, as he closed the door gently.
"I have a smarter plan!" Ray exclaimed, as he thought of an ingenious idea. "I will open the doors on my left, and you will open those on my right. That will speed things up!"
"Wow. You are smart!"
"Let's carry on then," Ray instructed, as they carried on opening the doors.
"ANYBODY THERE?" "ANYBODY THERE?" "No..." "No..."
After what seemed like hours, both of them were tired. "Man when is this going to end." Ray said, as he lay on the floor.
"Can't you two walk straight? I'm sick of waiting."
A handsome, young man came within sight. He was wearing a big, shiny gold necklace, baggy pants and a T-shirt that wrote: YoYoYo. "I was just 100m away from you. Who ever told you I was behind the doors?" He said, apparently irritated after waiting for so long.
"Impossible. Are you the legendary..." Tanya screamed, shocked by what she saw.
"Yoz! Sup man! Where is my Pokemon Pearl?" the man held out his hand in front of Tanya.
"There, holy one." Tanya waved her wand around. "Qwerty!" A pinkish cartridge with the words "Pokemon Pearl" appeared in the young man's hand.
"Where is my Nintendo DS?" the man asked once again.
"What is that?" Tanya asked, with a blank look on her face.
"You mean you didn't know that Pokemon Pearl can only be played on Nintendo DS? I only have Gameboy you @#$%!" he screamed.
"Erm. What are you two talking about?" Ray raised up his hand and asked politely.
"Yoyo! You must be one of the Chosen Five, the Hairy One. Nice to meet you."
Chapter 11
"Great, we just teleported to an unknown place with a stupid illustrated guide. Wonderful." Ray thought aloud.
Tanya ignored his whining (which sounded more like low-pitched moaning) and continued her assessment.
"Wait. This place looks familiar. That phone especially. It looks so.... girly."
Ray finally deciphered what the tri-coloured bed meant.
"We're in the girls' room!"
---------------------------------------------
"It seemed that I passed you the girl's bedtime story book instead of the manual... I apologize for that." Prof Utopia started. "Luckily, you haven't set the teleport destination too far from here. Maybe you should spend some time studying the manual first seeing your inexperience in these matters"
Meanwhile, the girls didn't look too pleased with their intrusion into their room. Maybe it had to do with the hairy mess Ray had caused there.
"I need to start using the hair-loss control lotion soon. I'm dropping hair everywhere!" Ray reminded himself.
Two days later, Ray and Tanya were confident enough, having read the manual cover to cover twice. Besides, their hosts wouldn't be too happy if they had keep the air conditioning on all day for Ray's comfort. His hair was trapping too much heat.
"So now, we teleport to Infral. We'll need to set the coordinates here, then adjust that value there..." Tanya droned on as Ray relaxed in the air-conditioned machine. He loved the feeling of the cool air on his skin. It seemed to tickle him. Though it may be his hair that's tickling instead.
"Done. Now we're all set to go. Say goodbye to Townsville!"
And so our heroes lifted off from their dimension, leaving for their home.
---------------------------------------------
Our heroes made a splash when they landed. Well, quite literally, for they landed their machine in a toilet. A rather large restroom to be precise.
Ray and Tanya decided to venture out of the toilet. The restroom was not exactly pleasant-smelling to be honest.
"And I'm not even sure if it the gents!" Ray thought nervously.
They left the toilet through a door at the side and got stunned by the sight ahead.
They were in a corridor full of doors on either side.
"This is freaking me out. Why is this more and more like the Matrix?" Ray squealed. "Tanya, you must have made a mistake."
A firm, deep voice resonated from nowhere.
"No, you haven't. I have brought you here. You guys have taken far too long to reach me, making me wait for eons. I had to take a shortcut you know. I can't play my Pokemon Emerald on my GameBoy over and over again too many times. It got boring after the fifth time."
"That must be Hanwen! We must get to him as soon as possible! He said I can claim my mesos after I bring you there! And give him the new Pokemon Pearl version" Tanya screamed excitedly.
Tears welled up Ray eyes.
But its not his imminent meeting with the great one that caused the tears. Its more of the long corridor that seemed to stretch forever. And the thousands of doors that he'll need to open.
Tanya ignored his whining (which sounded more like low-pitched moaning) and continued her assessment.
"Wait. This place looks familiar. That phone especially. It looks so.... girly."
Ray finally deciphered what the tri-coloured bed meant.
"We're in the girls' room!"
---------------------------------------------
"It seemed that I passed you the girl's bedtime story book instead of the manual... I apologize for that." Prof Utopia started. "Luckily, you haven't set the teleport destination too far from here. Maybe you should spend some time studying the manual first seeing your inexperience in these matters"
Meanwhile, the girls didn't look too pleased with their intrusion into their room. Maybe it had to do with the hairy mess Ray had caused there.
"I need to start using the hair-loss control lotion soon. I'm dropping hair everywhere!" Ray reminded himself.
Two days later, Ray and Tanya were confident enough, having read the manual cover to cover twice. Besides, their hosts wouldn't be too happy if they had keep the air conditioning on all day for Ray's comfort. His hair was trapping too much heat.
"So now, we teleport to Infral. We'll need to set the coordinates here, then adjust that value there..." Tanya droned on as Ray relaxed in the air-conditioned machine. He loved the feeling of the cool air on his skin. It seemed to tickle him. Though it may be his hair that's tickling instead.
"Done. Now we're all set to go. Say goodbye to Townsville!"
And so our heroes lifted off from their dimension, leaving for their home.
---------------------------------------------
Our heroes made a splash when they landed. Well, quite literally, for they landed their machine in a toilet. A rather large restroom to be precise.
Ray and Tanya decided to venture out of the toilet. The restroom was not exactly pleasant-smelling to be honest.
"And I'm not even sure if it the gents!" Ray thought nervously.
They left the toilet through a door at the side and got stunned by the sight ahead.
They were in a corridor full of doors on either side.
"This is freaking me out. Why is this more and more like the Matrix?" Ray squealed. "Tanya, you must have made a mistake."
A firm, deep voice resonated from nowhere.
"No, you haven't. I have brought you here. You guys have taken far too long to reach me, making me wait for eons. I had to take a shortcut you know. I can't play my Pokemon Emerald on my GameBoy over and over again too many times. It got boring after the fifth time."
"That must be Hanwen! We must get to him as soon as possible! He said I can claim my mesos after I bring you there! And give him the new Pokemon Pearl version" Tanya screamed excitedly.
Tears welled up Ray eyes.
But its not his imminent meeting with the great one that caused the tears. Its more of the long corridor that seemed to stretch forever. And the thousands of doors that he'll need to open.
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Chapter 10
Prof Utopia stared at Ray in bewilderment, "Yeah obviously I won't know until you tell me."
"Can you let us test out your Dimensional Traveller?" Ray asked, hoping that he can get out of this place as soon as possible.
"Oh sure. But don't blame me for any mishaps." Prof Utopia led them into his laboratory. "Girls, this place is too dangerous for you. Stay outside." He warned the three little girls who were following them.
"Aw. This sucks." Buttercup complained.
"There. My Dimensional Traveller." Prof Utopia pointed to a silvery machine with many lights and buttons. "Go on in." He smiled.
Ray stepped inside without thinking. "Come on Tanya. It's air-conditioned! You don't get much air-conditioning back in Infral..."
Tanya, being the smarter one of the pair, remembered the Social Studies skills she had learnt when she was 1 year old. "Are you sure this thing is reliable, sir? Can you show us some evidence before we go in and become your guinea pigs?" Tanya asked, apparently not trusting whatever Prof Utopia is saying.
"Oh sure." He showed Tanya a 9224 pages thick volume filled with equations and diagram. "There, the evidence you wanted."
Tanya flipped through it, not understanding a thing inside, but in a bid to make herself look smart, she pretended that she understood the contents. "That's some pretty comprehensive stuff you have there." Tanya said, as she was flipping through the pages.
"Yeah, so are you convinced now?" Prof Utopia asked.
"Oh ok." Tanya replied, as he went in to join Ray inside the machine.
"See, I told you this place was cool." Ray said.
"Prepare yourself for the journey!" Prof Utopia screamed, as he pressed a few buttons that caused the entrance of the machine to close and slowly, the machine roared into action as it started glowing...
"We are flying!" Ray screamed as they vanished from the laboratory.
----------------------------------
"Where are we?" Ray asked, looking around for evidences that may tell them where they are at.
They were in a well decorated, colourful room, with many toys and plushies thrown all over. Tanya took out the 9224 page thick volume of notes and started reading it, hoping that it may give them a hint of where they are.
Ray turned to Tanya and tried to read the notes as well. "What is the title of this thing." Ray asked, as he flipped the notes over to reveal the first page, which reads: Illustrated Maths Equations for Dummies.
"Can you let us test out your Dimensional Traveller?" Ray asked, hoping that he can get out of this place as soon as possible.
"Oh sure. But don't blame me for any mishaps." Prof Utopia led them into his laboratory. "Girls, this place is too dangerous for you. Stay outside." He warned the three little girls who were following them.
"Aw. This sucks." Buttercup complained.
"There. My Dimensional Traveller." Prof Utopia pointed to a silvery machine with many lights and buttons. "Go on in." He smiled.
Ray stepped inside without thinking. "Come on Tanya. It's air-conditioned! You don't get much air-conditioning back in Infral..."
Tanya, being the smarter one of the pair, remembered the Social Studies skills she had learnt when she was 1 year old. "Are you sure this thing is reliable, sir? Can you show us some evidence before we go in and become your guinea pigs?" Tanya asked, apparently not trusting whatever Prof Utopia is saying.
"Oh sure." He showed Tanya a 9224 pages thick volume filled with equations and diagram. "There, the evidence you wanted."
Tanya flipped through it, not understanding a thing inside, but in a bid to make herself look smart, she pretended that she understood the contents. "That's some pretty comprehensive stuff you have there." Tanya said, as she was flipping through the pages.
"Yeah, so are you convinced now?" Prof Utopia asked.
"Oh ok." Tanya replied, as he went in to join Ray inside the machine.
"See, I told you this place was cool." Ray said.
"Prepare yourself for the journey!" Prof Utopia screamed, as he pressed a few buttons that caused the entrance of the machine to close and slowly, the machine roared into action as it started glowing...
"We are flying!" Ray screamed as they vanished from the laboratory.
----------------------------------
"Where are we?" Ray asked, looking around for evidences that may tell them where they are at.
They were in a well decorated, colourful room, with many toys and plushies thrown all over. Tanya took out the 9224 page thick volume of notes and started reading it, hoping that it may give them a hint of where they are.
Ray turned to Tanya and tried to read the notes as well. "What is the title of this thing." Ray asked, as he flipped the notes over to reveal the first page, which reads: Illustrated Maths Equations for Dummies.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Chapter 9
"Ray, do something! We'll be killed!" Tanya screamed in a gay way again.
"But I don't know anything! Not even kung fu! And I got no weapon!"
"Just do something!"
Ray ran and hid behind a tree.
"WE ARE SCREWED!", the mayor squeaked.
It seemed like certain death awaits our unlikely gathering of heroes, mayors and impossibly tall assistants. Until the IronMan came.
Like a shooting star, the IronMan flew at an impossibly high speed, leaving a trail of pink smoke. It seems like Mr Stark has added some aesthetic features into his IronMan flight.
IronMan hovered about a kilometre away from the gigantic machine and shot 55 missiles and 1 bullet. The 55 missiles effectively neutralized the 55 laser guns. MuJu JuJu suffered a headshot with the 1 bullet.
The crowd, which suddenly appeared on the streets even though buildings are still burning and collapsing, started cheering IronMan. They proclaimed him the new Hero of Townsville.
"Wait!" A squeak echoed through the streets.
The massive sea of humans made way for the short, i mean vertically-challenged, mayor to pass through.
"What are you going to do with the pollution you caused in my sky?"
"And I want purple smoke, not pink!"
------------------------------
"Tanya, get us back to to our dimension NOW" Ray said seriously.
"Well, I sure can't. I lost my wand in that thing just now. I can only use basic spells using a normal stick. I'll need a higher quality stick to cast stronger spells, like the amazing dimension traveling one just now."
"Can you like help me? I'll give you a lollipop if you want!" Bubbles pleaded.
Tanya remembered enough of her lessons at Hagworts Junior College of Magic to heal her sufficiently with a random stick nearby, at least ensuring that she's alive.
Blossom and Buttercup came soon enough.
"Oh, what long and sexy hair yo-" Buttercup said with amazement.
Blossom stopped her.
"Buttercup, its not polite to comment on people's bodies in the first meeting! Now, would you like to drop by our house for coffee? We'll like to offer our thanks you know." Blossom said while staring at Ray's hair.
Ray was getting uncomfortable with the attention he's getting. But unfortunately, the girls were already carrying him and Tanya off to a little house in the distance.
------------------------------
At the house, Ray saw a person in a white coat.
"Oh my god, don't tell me PAP is present even in Townsville?"
The man smiled.
"Nonono, I'm Prof Utopia!" he started. "My aim is to create a utopia for everyone!"
He lowered his voice. "In fact, I helped Stark in his IronMan thing!"
"What are your areas of interest in research then?" Tanya asked, curious about someone who uses science instead of easy magic. Seems like an idiot to her.
"Well, I'm doing more of inventing machines. I'm trying a Dimension Traveller, though it seems like its a total failure now."
The word "Dimension" rang a bell in Ray's head.
"Prof Utopia, you don't know how grateful we will be to you..."
"But I don't know anything! Not even kung fu! And I got no weapon!"
"Just do something!"
Ray ran and hid behind a tree.
"WE ARE SCREWED!", the mayor squeaked.
It seemed like certain death awaits our unlikely gathering of heroes, mayors and impossibly tall assistants. Until the IronMan came.
Like a shooting star, the IronMan flew at an impossibly high speed, leaving a trail of pink smoke. It seems like Mr Stark has added some aesthetic features into his IronMan flight.
IronMan hovered about a kilometre away from the gigantic machine and shot 55 missiles and 1 bullet. The 55 missiles effectively neutralized the 55 laser guns. MuJu JuJu suffered a headshot with the 1 bullet.
The crowd, which suddenly appeared on the streets even though buildings are still burning and collapsing, started cheering IronMan. They proclaimed him the new Hero of Townsville.
"Wait!" A squeak echoed through the streets.
The massive sea of humans made way for the short, i mean vertically-challenged, mayor to pass through.
"What are you going to do with the pollution you caused in my sky?"
"And I want purple smoke, not pink!"
------------------------------
"Tanya, get us back to to our dimension NOW" Ray said seriously.
"Well, I sure can't. I lost my wand in that thing just now. I can only use basic spells using a normal stick. I'll need a higher quality stick to cast stronger spells, like the amazing dimension traveling one just now."
"Can you like help me? I'll give you a lollipop if you want!" Bubbles pleaded.
Tanya remembered enough of her lessons at Hagworts Junior College of Magic to heal her sufficiently with a random stick nearby, at least ensuring that she's alive.
Blossom and Buttercup came soon enough.
"Oh, what long and sexy hair yo-" Buttercup said with amazement.
Blossom stopped her.
"Buttercup, its not polite to comment on people's bodies in the first meeting! Now, would you like to drop by our house for coffee? We'll like to offer our thanks you know." Blossom said while staring at Ray's hair.
Ray was getting uncomfortable with the attention he's getting. But unfortunately, the girls were already carrying him and Tanya off to a little house in the distance.
------------------------------
At the house, Ray saw a person in a white coat.
"Oh my god, don't tell me PAP is present even in Townsville?"
The man smiled.
"Nonono, I'm Prof Utopia!" he started. "My aim is to create a utopia for everyone!"
He lowered his voice. "In fact, I helped Stark in his IronMan thing!"
"What are your areas of interest in research then?" Tanya asked, curious about someone who uses science instead of easy magic. Seems like an idiot to her.
"Well, I'm doing more of inventing machines. I'm trying a Dimension Traveller, though it seems like its a total failure now."
The word "Dimension" rang a bell in Ray's head.
"Prof Utopia, you don't know how grateful we will be to you..."
Chapter 8
"Can you open this box of pickles for me?" the man requested, as he held out a green bottle, "The girls have went to deal with MujuJuju."
Tanya took the bottle from him and tried opening it. "Man this is tough," Tanya cried, as she tried to open the cap.
"Let me try," Ray suggested, as he took the bottle from Tanya. With a flick of his finger, the cap unattached itself from the bottle and flew up into the sky, accidentally hitting a bird who was flying past.
The short man, his assistant and Tanya stared at Ray, amazed at what he has just done. "Even the girls can't open it that easily," the man squeaked, "Who are you?"
Just then, a small girl dressed in blue with yellow ponytails flew towards them and collapsed to the ground.
"Help..." the girl mumbled, before she finally fainted.
"Oh Bubbles!" the short man cried.
"She looks injured," Tanya said.
"Can't you heal her or something?" Ray asked Tanya, recalling the marvellous things she had done with her wand previously.
"Let me check my notes," Tanya searched her pockets, "Oh no. I must have used it as toilet paper just now."
A gigantic machine with 55 laser guns appeared from where Bubbles had came from, "Hahaha. I am Mu.....JuJuJu!"
Tanya took the bottle from him and tried opening it. "Man this is tough," Tanya cried, as she tried to open the cap.
"Let me try," Ray suggested, as he took the bottle from Tanya. With a flick of his finger, the cap unattached itself from the bottle and flew up into the sky, accidentally hitting a bird who was flying past.
The short man, his assistant and Tanya stared at Ray, amazed at what he has just done. "Even the girls can't open it that easily," the man squeaked, "Who are you?"
Just then, a small girl dressed in blue with yellow ponytails flew towards them and collapsed to the ground.
"Help..." the girl mumbled, before she finally fainted.
"Oh Bubbles!" the short man cried.
"She looks injured," Tanya said.
"Can't you heal her or something?" Ray asked Tanya, recalling the marvellous things she had done with her wand previously.
"Let me check my notes," Tanya searched her pockets, "Oh no. I must have used it as toilet paper just now."
A gigantic machine with 55 laser guns appeared from where Bubbles had came from, "Hahaha. I am Mu.....JuJuJu!"
Friday, June 13, 2008
Chapter 7
Ray prepared to fight, drawing out the pink light-saber Tanya had given him in the elevator. He focused all his energy into visualizing the fight, anticipating all the movements the men will make...
"Battery flat. Microsoft Light-Saber OS going into hibernation mode. Please switch to an alternate power supply now."
Ray made a mental note to charge his things properly from now on. If he even gets another chance to do so. And maybe switch to a non-microsoft OS. The computer's voice is too gay for his liking.
"Now, its time for you to pay for your sins." The leader of the sorcerers muttered.
"Abra Kadabra!"
----------------------------------
It was pitch dark. Surely, heaven (or hell) shouldn't be that dark?
"Tanya? Are you around?" Ray asked probingly.
"Yeah. Saved your butt there."
"Hey thanks. Wait. Why is it so dark? Am I in something like a dark corner of hell or what?"
"You know, things wouldn't be so confusing if you opened your eyes." Came the curt reply.
"Oh."
Ray opened his eyes and found himself in a lawn. Not an ordinary lawn, but one in a school compound. This place looks kind of like a cartoon to him.
Then he saw three small girls dressed in red, blue and green respectively fly past, leaving straight clean multi-coloured lines.
"Tanya! Explain this please! Why do I have the feeling I'm inside a freaking cartoon?"
Tanya sighed. This will take some time.
"OK, just now you almost died when the guy cast that spell on you. Lucky you, I managed to be nearby. You see, I remembered that you were holding the toilet paper that I needed. Seeing imminent danger, I used the second important spell that Hanwen taught me instinctively. The Dimension Travel Spell."
That didn't explain things to Ray. Maybe his 1kB brain was the problem.
"Hanwen said you have to think of the dimension you want to go to when casting. So I thought of the Dimensionless-Dimension which is the Matrix. You know, there're so many doors, maybe one will lead to the Oracle, I mean Hanwen."
"So why are we here?"
"I saw your powerpuff girls underwear."
A short stout man came into sight this instant. With an impossibly tall assistant.
"Welcome to Townsville!" He squeaked.
"Battery flat. Microsoft Light-Saber OS going into hibernation mode. Please switch to an alternate power supply now."
Ray made a mental note to charge his things properly from now on. If he even gets another chance to do so. And maybe switch to a non-microsoft OS. The computer's voice is too gay for his liking.
"Now, its time for you to pay for your sins." The leader of the sorcerers muttered.
"Abra Kadabra!"
----------------------------------
It was pitch dark. Surely, heaven (or hell) shouldn't be that dark?
"Tanya? Are you around?" Ray asked probingly.
"Yeah. Saved your butt there."
"Hey thanks. Wait. Why is it so dark? Am I in something like a dark corner of hell or what?"
"You know, things wouldn't be so confusing if you opened your eyes." Came the curt reply.
"Oh."
Ray opened his eyes and found himself in a lawn. Not an ordinary lawn, but one in a school compound. This place looks kind of like a cartoon to him.
Then he saw three small girls dressed in red, blue and green respectively fly past, leaving straight clean multi-coloured lines.
"Tanya! Explain this please! Why do I have the feeling I'm inside a freaking cartoon?"
Tanya sighed. This will take some time.
"OK, just now you almost died when the guy cast that spell on you. Lucky you, I managed to be nearby. You see, I remembered that you were holding the toilet paper that I needed. Seeing imminent danger, I used the second important spell that Hanwen taught me instinctively. The Dimension Travel Spell."
That didn't explain things to Ray. Maybe his 1kB brain was the problem.
"Hanwen said you have to think of the dimension you want to go to when casting. So I thought of the Dimensionless-Dimension which is the Matrix. You know, there're so many doors, maybe one will lead to the Oracle, I mean Hanwen."
"So why are we here?"
"I saw your powerpuff girls underwear."
A short stout man came into sight this instant. With an impossibly tall assistant.
"Welcome to Townsville!" He squeaked.
Chapter 6
As the party was following Tarzen out of the jungle, Willy Wongka disappeared.
"Where is he?" Ray asked.
"He was just an image conjured by me," Tanya answered, "Fear not, we have Tarzen to guide us now."
Ray nodded, hoping that everything will turn out fine.
"Ouch!" Tanya screamed.
"What now?" Ray asked, afraid that something bad has happened again.
"I don't know. It must be that butterfly I ate in prison. I'm having butterflies in my stomach now. I doubt I can carry on from here. Go on hairy one. Fulfil ur destiny." Tanya said, as she conjured up a toilet bowl and sat there.
"Oh well," Ray continued following Tarzen out of the jungle.
"Shining Ray O' Flight. You can run but you can't hide. Come out now, wherever you are!"
"OMG it's the Lord's sorceresses!" Ray screamed, as a group of men cloaked and masked in black approached him. "Didn't Hairy Potter defeat them?"
"Do you seriously think that we, the greatest sorcerers of the universe, can be destroyed by a kid on that small, pathetic planet Earth? Abra Kadabra!" The wand of the sorcerer who was talking shot out a flash of green light.
"No!!!" Tarzen jumped in front of Ray, taking the blow for him.
"Tarzen!" Ray screamed.
"Go on, hairy one. You have to reach the holy sage. At all cost..." Tarzen died.
"Tarzen! How am I supposed to get out of here when you are dead you idiot!?" Ray screamed hysterically, as the group of men are approaching him...
"Where is he?" Ray asked.
"He was just an image conjured by me," Tanya answered, "Fear not, we have Tarzen to guide us now."
Ray nodded, hoping that everything will turn out fine.
"Ouch!" Tanya screamed.
"What now?" Ray asked, afraid that something bad has happened again.
"I don't know. It must be that butterfly I ate in prison. I'm having butterflies in my stomach now. I doubt I can carry on from here. Go on hairy one. Fulfil ur destiny." Tanya said, as she conjured up a toilet bowl and sat there.
"Oh well," Ray continued following Tarzen out of the jungle.
"Shining Ray O' Flight. You can run but you can't hide. Come out now, wherever you are!"
"OMG it's the Lord's sorceresses!" Ray screamed, as a group of men cloaked and masked in black approached him. "Didn't Hairy Potter defeat them?"
"Do you seriously think that we, the greatest sorcerers of the universe, can be destroyed by a kid on that small, pathetic planet Earth? Abra Kadabra!" The wand of the sorcerer who was talking shot out a flash of green light.
"No!!!" Tarzen jumped in front of Ray, taking the blow for him.
"Tarzen!" Ray screamed.
"Go on, hairy one. You have to reach the holy sage. At all cost..." Tarzen died.
"Tarzen! How am I supposed to get out of here when you are dead you idiot!?" Ray screamed hysterically, as the group of men are approaching him...
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Chapter 5
After a day of desperate struggle with numerous attempted spells, the party finally managed to transform the spikes back into the hair it was.
Ray looked around (again). Concluding rather despondently that there are no girls to show off to, he decided to assess the situation.
"OK, so we're in the middle of a desert. Great. Tanya, please guide us with your boundless wisdom."
"This is a time when we need a guide to lead us out of this godforsaken desert. I shall now conjure a guide. Alamaka Guido Weneed!" Tanya blurted out in one single breath.
The desert turned into a rainforest. Only thing was, the weeds and trees were not really as they seemed. They were actually hair. Ray's hair.
Ray made a mental note to remember this spell. This would be useful should he get too hot.
"That didn't help things much." Wongka said matter-of-factly. "I mean we're still lost."
Just at that moment, a half-dressed male swinging up among the trees on vines came into sight. With his signature yell that cannot be expressed in words.
"TARZEN!" Ray screamed. "Oh my god! I mean you're my idol! I saw you on FHM magazine!" (FHM stands for For Hairy Men)
"Yuloas asikop linuy huirab!" Tarzen trumpeted.
So it seemed that he doesn't speak English.
Tanya said, "No problem, let me use a spell on him."
He pointed his wand at Tarzen and screamed in the gayest pitch possible again, "Translatos Barbariantoenglish!"
Nothing happened.
Willy Wongka then took out his PDA and went to Google Translate, accessing the wireless@IFRAL network. They realised that Tarzen had said "I offer my guiding services for 10 meso!"
And so after reducing the rate to 9 meso and 1 choco crunch, the party set off through the jungle where more adventures await.
Ray looked around (again). Concluding rather despondently that there are no girls to show off to, he decided to assess the situation.
"OK, so we're in the middle of a desert. Great. Tanya, please guide us with your boundless wisdom."
"This is a time when we need a guide to lead us out of this godforsaken desert. I shall now conjure a guide. Alamaka Guido Weneed!" Tanya blurted out in one single breath.
The desert turned into a rainforest. Only thing was, the weeds and trees were not really as they seemed. They were actually hair. Ray's hair.
Ray made a mental note to remember this spell. This would be useful should he get too hot.
"That didn't help things much." Wongka said matter-of-factly. "I mean we're still lost."
Just at that moment, a half-dressed male swinging up among the trees on vines came into sight. With his signature yell that cannot be expressed in words.
"TARZEN!" Ray screamed. "Oh my god! I mean you're my idol! I saw you on FHM magazine!" (FHM stands for For Hairy Men)
"Yuloas asikop linuy huirab!" Tarzen trumpeted.
So it seemed that he doesn't speak English.
Tanya said, "No problem, let me use a spell on him."
He pointed his wand at Tarzen and screamed in the gayest pitch possible again, "Translatos Barbariantoenglish!"
Nothing happened.
Willy Wongka then took out his PDA and went to Google Translate, accessing the wireless@IFRAL network. They realised that Tarzen had said "I offer my guiding services for 10 meso!"
And so after reducing the rate to 9 meso and 1 choco crunch, the party set off through the jungle where more adventures await.
Chapter 4
Ray stepped into the elevator with Willy Wongka.
"Go on hairy one. The fate of Infral lies in your hair now." Tanya said, as he swung his wand once more, "Rotavele!" The elevator shot up into the sky.
"Woohoo I'm free now!" Ray exclaimed, as the elevator shoots past the jail.
"Thanks. I can alight now." Ray said.
Willy Wongka looked at Ray, "Are you joking, can't you see that we are completely sealed in glass?"
Ray looked around the elevator he was in. He processed the image in his brain for a couple of minutes. He was really sealed in glass. "How did you come in then?"
"Hairy one, I did not come in. I was born in here. It is my destiny to bring the chosen ones out of the jail, not to bring them out of the elevator." Willy replied.
"OMG! How do I get out of here!" Ray screamed at the top of his voice.
"Hairy one, calm down." A distant yet powerful voice was calling out to Ray.
"Is that you? Are you God? Are you here to save me?" Ray exclaimed, excited at the prospect of being saved.
"Not really. But I am here to teach you how to save yourself." the voice answered. "Look around you. See what you can find."
Ray looked around him, and saw a piece of red colored underwear. He picked it up with his fingers. It surely wasn't there the last time he looked around.
"Put that on, hairy one." the voice instructed.
Having no other choices, Ray put the red underwear on. Then, he started to burn. "OMG! I'm HOT!" Just when he thought that he was going to be burnt to death, his hair straightened and lengthened into strong, sharp needles, piercing through the glass that had once enclosed him, causing it to shatter into many pieces.
"Wow, you are so man!" Willy Wongka screamed, amazed at the amazing feat that Ray has just performed.
Ray stood there, shocked at his own powers.
"Go on hairy one. The fate of Infral lies in your hair now." Tanya said, as he swung his wand once more, "Rotavele!" The elevator shot up into the sky.
"Woohoo I'm free now!" Ray exclaimed, as the elevator shoots past the jail.
"Thanks. I can alight now." Ray said.
Willy Wongka looked at Ray, "Are you joking, can't you see that we are completely sealed in glass?"
Ray looked around the elevator he was in. He processed the image in his brain for a couple of minutes. He was really sealed in glass. "How did you come in then?"
"Hairy one, I did not come in. I was born in here. It is my destiny to bring the chosen ones out of the jail, not to bring them out of the elevator." Willy replied.
"OMG! How do I get out of here!" Ray screamed at the top of his voice.
"Hairy one, calm down." A distant yet powerful voice was calling out to Ray.
"Is that you? Are you God? Are you here to save me?" Ray exclaimed, excited at the prospect of being saved.
"Not really. But I am here to teach you how to save yourself." the voice answered. "Look around you. See what you can find."
Ray looked around him, and saw a piece of red colored underwear. He picked it up with his fingers. It surely wasn't there the last time he looked around.
"Put that on, hairy one." the voice instructed.
Having no other choices, Ray put the red underwear on. Then, he started to burn. "OMG! I'm HOT!" Just when he thought that he was going to be burnt to death, his hair straightened and lengthened into strong, sharp needles, piercing through the glass that had once enclosed him, causing it to shatter into many pieces.
"Wow, you are so man!" Willy Wongka screamed, amazed at the amazing feat that Ray has just performed.
Ray stood there, shocked at his own powers.
Chapter 3
The lord summoned him to the Great Hall of the Lord Who Rocks the very next minute.
"All hail Lord Who Rocks!", Ray proclaimed, kowtowing the required 50 times.
"You may rise. Let's see your crimes. You have turned 50 arces of my beautiful wheat into Choco Crunch? HOW DARE YOU! I wanted cornflakes! I tell my mama then you know!
"Men, put him into the prison while I think of a cruel and inhumane torture for him! I WANT MY CORNFLAKES!"
And so the two big, muscular bodybuilers (one of whom Ray had seen in a mocha advertisements before) lifted him up and threw him into the dark cell underground.
------------------
In the dark, Ray felt around, trying to get a bearing. After a few days of feeling around, he touched something that wasn't stone. Unfortunately, it was his beard. You see, the stress he experienced had caused him to contract a terminal uncontrollable hair-growth condition.
Finally, a day after, he managed to feel someone.
"Who are you?" he asked, trembling.
"I am Tanya Chye, the wisest person in this land. Only thing is, I haven't thought of a way to get out of this cell. I can give you random ramblings that're supposed to be wise though."
------------------
Ray had been in the cell for a long time when Tanya suddenly stood up.
"I REMEMBER NOW!"
"What?" Ray was intrigued.
"You see, a wise sage by the name of Hanwen came to our town last time. He predicted that a hairy man from this town will save the entire world from the evil feudal lords! He told me that when I meet him, I'll have to help him. He taught me some spells to use, let me try to remember... Aha! This is the time now to fulfil my destiny!"
Finishing, Tanya took out a long wand and waved it around. He then screamed at the gayest pitch possible "AlohaYougra Katamari gayami!"
A glass elevator appeared in front of them. A man with a hat and a long stick came out.
"Hello, I'm Willy Wongka!"
Ray smiled. There's a way out of the cell now.
"All hail Lord Who Rocks!", Ray proclaimed, kowtowing the required 50 times.
"You may rise. Let's see your crimes. You have turned 50 arces of my beautiful wheat into Choco Crunch? HOW DARE YOU! I wanted cornflakes! I tell my mama then you know!
"Men, put him into the prison while I think of a cruel and inhumane torture for him! I WANT MY CORNFLAKES!"
And so the two big, muscular bodybuilers (one of whom Ray had seen in a mocha advertisements before) lifted him up and threw him into the dark cell underground.
------------------
In the dark, Ray felt around, trying to get a bearing. After a few days of feeling around, he touched something that wasn't stone. Unfortunately, it was his beard. You see, the stress he experienced had caused him to contract a terminal uncontrollable hair-growth condition.
Finally, a day after, he managed to feel someone.
"Who are you?" he asked, trembling.
"I am Tanya Chye, the wisest person in this land. Only thing is, I haven't thought of a way to get out of this cell. I can give you random ramblings that're supposed to be wise though."
------------------
Ray had been in the cell for a long time when Tanya suddenly stood up.
"I REMEMBER NOW!"
"What?" Ray was intrigued.
"You see, a wise sage by the name of Hanwen came to our town last time. He predicted that a hairy man from this town will save the entire world from the evil feudal lords! He told me that when I meet him, I'll have to help him. He taught me some spells to use, let me try to remember... Aha! This is the time now to fulfil my destiny!"
Finishing, Tanya took out a long wand and waved it around. He then screamed at the gayest pitch possible "AlohaYougra Katamari gayami!"
A glass elevator appeared in front of them. A man with a hat and a long stick came out.
"Hello, I'm Willy Wongka!"
Ray smiled. There's a way out of the cell now.
Chapter 2
Just then, his phone rang. "Powerpuff, trying to save the world~~~" Ray reached into his pocket and took out his sleek, pink phone with a keychain featuring Bubbles in the Powerpuff Girls series. "Yes?" "Erm is this Mr Ray O' Flight?" "If you are looking for Mr Shining Ray O' Flight, that's me." "Oh hi Mr Ray, I am calling on behalf of Nestle. I would like to request permission to use your field for an advertisement for ChocoCrunch Cereals. If you are coorperate with us, we can give you up to 2000 mesos for your to buy more crops and fertilisers." Ray processed the information for a few minutes, "Oh yes sorry for the late reply. I agree to your proposal." "Thank you. We will begin filming tomorrow. Please be ready." "Sure." Ray replied. He is finally going to have mesos! The lord never ever paid him any salary for his work.
---The next day---
The sound of a helicopter woke Ray up from his sleep. He stepped out of his house, only to see a brown koala bear jumping down to his field. The next moment, brown, thick chocolate flooded his wheatfield. And, it became ChocoCrunch! It was at this instant that Ray suddenly realised that the field is not his! "Oh no. I am so dead." he thought to himself.
---The next day---
The sound of a helicopter woke Ray up from his sleep. He stepped out of his house, only to see a brown koala bear jumping down to his field. The next moment, brown, thick chocolate flooded his wheatfield. And, it became ChocoCrunch! It was at this instant that Ray suddenly realised that the field is not his! "Oh no. I am so dead." he thought to himself.
Chapter 1
The sun was high up in the sky as usual. In this part of Infral, it always does. It has something to do with the fact that the planet doesn't rotate about its axis, but that is of no concern to Ray.
As a matter of fact, he loved it only for the life-giving properties it imbues in his crops. After years of sweating it out in the open, he learnt that too much of a good thing may not be good.
He cast his gaze across the horizon, taking in the green and yellow his wheat plantation. Yes, the same thing that has filled him with pride and achievement in the past, but now just a sad reminder that all he has in his life is this. A plot of land with plants on it. And the land's not even his, belonging to the feudal lord he is under.
Which brings back the memories of the past. The past of atrocities the lord has done against him. His family. His community.
He stopped his mind dead in its tracks.
"Focus. I am but a laborer. Just do my job and I'll not be at the gallows"
-------------------------
Resting at his hut for the day, his mind wandered off into unsafe territory again. This time, he was curious. He did something he never did. He thought about his future.
He saw himself. Happy. And free.
He stopped again, afraid that the lord's sorcerers will read his mind. If that happens, there will be no present to talk about, let alone future. He broke out in cold sweat at this chilling thought, even as the sun blazed mercilessly.
Yet a voice was calling out to him. Telling him that he must have the strength. Strength to change the status quo.
The strength to do something about the situation.
Little does he know how this voice in him will change his life. Along with the fate of Infral.
As a matter of fact, he loved it only for the life-giving properties it imbues in his crops. After years of sweating it out in the open, he learnt that too much of a good thing may not be good.
He cast his gaze across the horizon, taking in the green and yellow his wheat plantation. Yes, the same thing that has filled him with pride and achievement in the past, but now just a sad reminder that all he has in his life is this. A plot of land with plants on it. And the land's not even his, belonging to the feudal lord he is under.
Which brings back the memories of the past. The past of atrocities the lord has done against him. His family. His community.
He stopped his mind dead in its tracks.
"Focus. I am but a laborer. Just do my job and I'll not be at the gallows"
-------------------------
Resting at his hut for the day, his mind wandered off into unsafe territory again. This time, he was curious. He did something he never did. He thought about his future.
He saw himself. Happy. And free.
He stopped again, afraid that the lord's sorcerers will read his mind. If that happens, there will be no present to talk about, let alone future. He broke out in cold sweat at this chilling thought, even as the sun blazed mercilessly.
Yet a voice was calling out to him. Telling him that he must have the strength. Strength to change the status quo.
The strength to do something about the situation.
Little does he know how this voice in him will change his life. Along with the fate of Infral.
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